Bedtime

It's occurred to me, on more than one occasion, that one of the reasons I'm so blah and lethargic is I don't get enough sleep.  That is, I don't get enough sleep on a regular basis.  I stay up too late and struggle to get up in the morning during the week; then I sleep for 10-12 hours on the weekend, stay up late, and cause my problems all over again for the following week.


A few days ago, I told a friend that I am now going to be lights out, phone off, by 10 pm every night.  It's now 10:15, so I didn't make it tonight, but as soon as I'm done with this post, it will be lights out and phone off.  


One of the reasons I started by telling this particular friend my new rule is that she totally ignores me when I say how tired I am and just keeps talking even when I am unresponsive during our hour-long phone calls that start at 11.  It's definitely my fault to a certain extent - as much as I love this friend, I dread calling her sometimes because she repeats herself constantly and has very little positive things to discuss.  I find that I get mired down in it and it exhausts me, so I procrastinate. Finally, when it's the last minute and I need to keep my word about calling her back, it's late.  Then she just keeps on talking. She's been out of work for almost a year now, maybe more. I think I'm one of her few social outlets.  It just exhausts me, for various reasons that I won't discuss here.  Suffice to say, by setting the rule of 10 pm, my phone has not rung after 9 for 3 nights in a row.  YAY!!!!  I feel guilty, because she's got a heart of gold, but my capacity for the details of what's occurring in her life was dramatically reduced once my mother got sick and died.  I just don't have it in me anymore - at least to the level of detail that she shares.  


I think that might be one of the reasons I don't write as much here, either.  Energy, or lack thereof.  What does it matter without Mom?


Sunday I leave for a four-city tour of Kansas for work.  Wichita, Salina, Lawrence, and Overland Park.  In August.  HOT AUGUST.  Ugh.  The people sure are nice in Kansas though, that much is true!!  I'm bringing my sneakers and I am going to use the treadmills at the hotels. I'm also going to bring my Medifast and see if I can get back on the ball.  My goal is to not GAIN while I'm traveling.  If I can achieve that, I'll be very happy.


It's past my bedtime...so...good night!